So, today on my way home I was listening to the country music station, because the slow Christmas music on the radio was putting me in a coma. I heard a song I had heard a million times by Toby Keith, "Cryin' for me". The basic premise of the song is that He isn't sad that his friend is in Heaven, he knows that's where he wants to be, he is sad because he is stuck here on earth without him.
Oddly enough today at school we were talking about funerals in casual conversation. I have been thinking about funerals alot with two of my sweet, close friends losing loved ones and well to be honest when you are laid up in the hospital for 7 days, you think about these things.
This song just struck a cord, because people also seem to want to gloss over loss or grief or suffering by playing the "I have Joy in Christ" card or some other cliche.(not saying those statements don't have truth in them, just saying they aren't always helpful or appropriate). NO, why don't we say..yah you are right..this sucks, cry as much as you want and nobody here is going to judge you, or lose it for a while if you need to. No we ask for forced smiles, brief grief, and when it isn't like that we get uncomfortable.
I don't know about you, but I just don't work that way. I can't just gloss over a loss or suffering and act like it didn't get me down or bother me or heck even make me angry (ohhh now that is pushing it right!) God wants our real self, not some put together plastic faking charade. It is okay to cry, scream, question...he wants to hear it and frankly your community should want to hear it too. YES, it is more work to deal with our junk...but it is worth it and it is much healthier than shoving it down.
So...cry...grieve...lament...David did and he made it in the Bible. I think that is permission enough. Anyone that says otherwise, point them to a Psalm or two!!
1 comment:
I so agree with this and thank you for your words. Youre so right, although I've also found there are a lot of times when this isn't feasible, which sucks... when people don't know or seem to want to know what's happened or someone isn't ready to talk about it. Grieving is definitely important and necessary for healthy growth, but we all do it In our own ways. Some days are harder than others, when we experience any type of loss, but it's easy to get in a place of "stuck" if we don't hold tightly to whatever rope we use that's connected to a light source.
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