WARNING! This is a downer post.
Do you ever just feel like life is snowballing over you? This week has barely begun and it has been overwhelming, exhausting, and frustrating. I feel like that saying "When it rains, it pours" really is true sometimes. I told you already in my previous post that I am really asking God what JOY looks like because I feel that I don't express that or possess it as often as I should. I know that some of that is my misunderstanding of the definition because like every human I UNDERSTAND the Merriam Webster version of having emotion when things are going right. What I don't understand is how I am supposed to look as a Christian when things AREN'T going right. I don't want to wallow but I don't want to fake it either.
I mean I think a huge part of being in community is authentic conversation about where we are, who we are, and what is going on in our lives. Sure only sharing positives or surface things are so much easier, but would we really be letting God get the glory He owns in our lives.
I have had some hard things hit this year, harder than I ever could have imagined. I can honestly say there have been more bad days than good. Has that changed my hope in the Lord, no...drawn it closer, yes. Do I walk around with a pasted smile or a light heart..no. I am who I am. I guess I am on a quest to balance this, when the world smacks you down (it will) and how I respond.
Pray for me this week, that I would be faithful to seeking God as my joy and that I would catch a glimpse of what that looks like.
2 comments:
You don't know me but my name is Kurt and I am a former collegue and now friend of Jason Sudan.
I wanted to tell you how refreshing your posts have been to me. I too am struggling in these same battles each day and it seems there is no end in sight. I know you have posted on joy in the LORD but I typically feel least joyful when I am not trusting in the LORD to care for my needs. I do feel, however, that if we put our trust in the the LORD when faced with our greatest trials, we bring him great glory and honor. I keep going back to Isaiah 41 verses 10, 13, and 14.
10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
13 For I am the LORD, your God, who takes hold of your right hand
and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.
14 Do not be afraid, O worm Jacob, O little Israel, for I myself will help you," declares the LORD your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel.
His word devotes three entire verses in a span of five, to tell us not to fear...that is, not to fear anything, for nothing shall separate us from the love of Christ.
I know this commentary is a bit rambling, but I thought I would share and hopefully bring peace to your day.
May peace always be with you.
Thanks so much Kurt, I definitely needed to hear that word from the Lord today!
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